If I May Be So Bold …

2016 has nearly wrapped up, and there’s something I need to say. I haven’t posted as much this year as I had wanted because life and, particularly in this year, death have gotten in the way.  I went to far too many funerals this year.  One is too many, and I went to several more than that.  Those and a terrifying night in a distant Emergency Room have left me with one message for this end of 2016:

Life can turn on a dime. And it will.  A split second, a hair’s breadth.  Very literally, in the time it takes you to look up, everything in your life, anyone you care about, could go away.  Forever.  And you’ll be left gasping, trying to figure out how you’re going to go forward, how you can continue to exist in this new reality you’ve been shoved into.

Don’t make it harder for yourself when that time comes.   Take a few minutes right now and consider each of your relationships with your friends and your family.  Are they the best they can be under whatever circumstances now exist?

I’m not talking about forgiving those who’ve been evil to you or have done you harm. I’m not talking about letting others treat you badly.  I’m talking about reflecting on whether you have the best reasonably possible relationship at this specific moment with the people you care about so that, if they were suddenly gone, you won’t be left living with an “if only”.  I’m talking about giving yourself the ability, when the time comes, to grieve without guilt.

If there’s a valid reason for the problem, make peace with yourself and let it be. If it’s bad because you’re stubborn and you’re waiting for someone else to be the better person, suck it up and fix it.  Unless you’re actually a six year old, don’t act like one.  Don’t wait for tomorrow to make things better.  One of these days won’t have a tomorrow.

And don’t just do it right now. Do it always, continually.  Keep it ever in mind that this moment, this very one, might be your last with someone.  Then act accordingly.

Please. This is my wish for everyone right now.

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